When In Doubt, Turn To Sports

Feh.

I'm not sure what's worse: the quality of the teams for which I am eternally cheering, or the fact that I can't stop myself. This has not been a good fall for sports. Sure, the A's made the playoffs again, and even got out of the first round. But then they got swept like they were the Kansas City Royals (next year's champs, by the by) and all the good feelings are gone. I can't even bring myself to root for/against/for/idon'tknowanymore Tony LaRussa.

In college football, I've got the best and worst of times. Ohio State is still #1 in the country, but the Miami Hurricanes are looking more thugged out and embarassing than ever. It was bad enough the team wasn't very good to start, now they've got yet another black eye on the reputation, such as it was. I mean, save that shit for when you turn pro, kids! At least that way, you can afford good lawyers. Just ask Ray Lewis.

On the pro side...oy. I can't even bring myself to talk about the pathetic situation that is year two of the Saban-era Dolphins. And yet--AND YET--there's a too-vocal-for-it's-own-good part of me that is thinking they can run the table after the bye week. (Shut up. Just shut up! Yes, I looked at the schedule.) Better yet, I'm picturing it with them totally adopting a gunslinger mentality with Cleo Lemon at quarterback, chucking it downfield to Chambers, Vick, and Welker. At least my insane imaginings are comical and not based in any sort of reality.

The only way I can imagine enjoying sports this fall, beyond the Buckeyes pounding the Wolverines, is if the Atlanta Hawks get off to a hot start. (SHUT UP!) I know. It's like playing Russian roulette with a loaded gun. I'm just asking for it. Well, I don't give a good god damn. Marvin and Shelden Williams to glory!

I. Suck.

On the plus side, with nothing interesting going on in sports (Cram your hockey! Cram it!), I have been able to use my what little down time I have from work to slog through the media bottleneck in my apartment. Music, books, games and movies have been go. Which reminds me: go pick up the new Melvins disc. Now. Seriously. It's called A Senile Animal and is worth the money. Don't you like to rock? Don'tcha?! Freedom hater.