"I'm a firm believer in the philosophy of a ruling class. Especially since I rule." This could either be genius or tragic. Only time will tell.

Speaking of ruling geniuses, I believe I'll own this year's fantasy football for once. If the powers that be are going to curse me with a poo-poo Dolphins team, the least they could do is hook me up with a fat fantasy football payoff. Deuce McAllister to glory, bitches!

Now if you'll go excuse me, I have a little nasal drip to attend to.