Saturday, July 3, 2004

Check me out America...

I'm being an asshole!

Ahhhhh...Friday. What have we done to you?

The day was short (burned a bit of my overtime to leave early) but sweet, as we had thai food for lunch. That's solid, no? Anyway, I left work a bit early so I could meet up with JG and CO for a little bar crawl action. Despite my advanced age, this is, in fact, my very first bar crawl. And she was a solid one.

Things kicked off at Mackeys, a bar on L St., where the main registration was held. Registration was $13 on-site, or $10 with a couple of cans of food. Or, if you weren't lazy like I, you could have registered in advance for $7. Met JG at the metro, then we both met with CO, who was already at the bar. Registered, and the drinking was on. Stood outside with the other participants, packed neatly into the little patio area. Things of note from Mackeys:

There was a surprising lack of baseball caps (at least standing outside), save two guys with their Red Sox hats on. Believe me, these ducks embodied everything wearing such a chapeau would indicate.

"Circus ugly." Okay, I'm certainly not a GQ model, and it is mean to just be slamming random women, but there was a girl there who was just hideous, and became sort of the running joke of the night, as she wound up being at many of the bars at the same time as we (since there were a number of bars on the list, and there is no order of attendance, this is actually odd). She had a Mrs. Potato Head-thing going on. Sorry, but just thinking about her again makes me vurp. (See? Asshole!)

The guy at Recessions, next door and also part of the crawl, had a creepy, Everquest playing, van with tinted windows look going on. He was out there announcing "$2 shooters!" but was not getting much of a response. Shocker, no?

So after Mackeys, we bail on to Rumours, which is at the corner of 19th and M. Again, we got on the patio and just took it all in. Not a bad spot, especially when one of the dancers for Camelot walked by in all of her wonderful, beautifully fake (as opposed to "painfully fake"; I think we all know the difference) titted glory. Magnifico! We are eventually joined for a bit by CO's co-worker, T. Good guy, funny guy, nearly made me choke on my beer when he pointed out some old dude coming up the street (in my current, slightly hungover state, I cannot remember what he said about him). He eventually left with some femininas (friends of his) who did not want to pay the cover (all the bars were charging $5 covers if you had no wristband for the crawl). I should state that our selection of this venue was not entirely random, as JG spotted a couple of hot youngbloods on the patio that we had noticed at Mackeys. Sadly, I don't think we saw them the rest of the night. (I know I didn't.)

So once we're done with Mackey's, it's on to Lulu's, which is 23rd and M (I believe). On the way, we stop at McDonald's, so I can get a little bit of food into me (just a burger) and I called my mom, in a semi-inebriated state, to check on my sister, who is having some medical issues that are pretty common in my family. I should know by next Thursday (approx) what exactly is happening on that front. I have a feeling everything will be okay, but that doesn't dampen my concern any.

And now Lulu's. First, this was the first Lulu's experience for all of us, which is surprising considering we've all been in this area for the last 10-odd years. We probably would have gone on President's Day '03, as Girls Gone Wild was there, but that was also the weekend we got a couple of feet of snow dumped on us. I was stuck in Silver Spring for 4 days. Good times.

Second, it was really dead at that point. Lulu's was definitely going to be the finishing spot for the night. So after a beer, we beat it out of there. Nothing much to report from this establishment. Up next, Porters.

(I'm running out of time, as I'm about to meet with AK for a glorious day of fun, so I'll post this now and finish it later. Believe me, you do not want to miss that. Stay tuned, bitches!)